Heyyy ! I’m in study right now. It’s like 12:25. I talked to TJ this morning in history and he said tomorrow he wants to hang out with shelby, me, and joey. but it’s joey’s dad’s weekend so i dont know what’s gonna happen. hopefully something good for me. if he likes me, i hope he does something soon because im not gonna wait around forever. me and shelby decided two weeks would be a reasonable amount to wait. I was on the phone with Shelby last night and I told her she should call TJ, so she did, on three way but he didn’t know i was there. And Shelby was like, “Okay, does joey like jenn ?” and he was like ” well she kinda annoys him because whenever she wants to hang out with him Mike Marinucci calls and like, demands that they hang out and he just gets mad.” So I’m definitely going to try to be less annoying, for my sake. I think that we’re watching some movies tomorrow at Tj’s house downstairs. They have a huuge tv so yeahh. i have Spanish in two periods ! Thank godd. I haven’t talked to “boy” all day long. Yesterday;s spanish class was pretty good btw. We talked a lot, and for some odd reason I forget what most of it was about. But I remember that near the end of class Erin was like “omg jenn, that’s so weird.” and i was like “…what’s weird?” and she goes, “you and joey like, match.” and he was like “heh heh heh” and i put my arm next to his, and i was like “no..haha” and he was like “haha yeah not really.” so that was pretty good. hopefully we have more interaction today Ewww. I have physics next and I don’t think I dod my hw. But i’ll rip something out and pretend it was the hw maybe. I also have to write my ballad tonight for english. I pretened I did it and passed something in today. It was the real lyrics to ‘Everytime I Look For You’ by Blink-182. It would be so weird if some stupid pre-teens made a band/group called Blink 183. My foot’s asleep and it hurts really bad. I have double study on Monday ! I think that’s really good. I still have about 25 minutes left in this one though, so that makes me pretty happy . ugh ! all i can think about is how i want to hang out with joey tomorrow and how much i like him ! hahah, me and bridget skipped lunch and went to the indoor track above the gym and we were standing there looking at joey for a good 5 minutes then J.Grant yelled, “Where are you girls supposed to be ?!” And we were like, “lunch !” and she was like “then go back to lunch !” and she started screaming other things at us to, but neither of us were listening. And then bridget was like, “hahah, gym nazi” and we laughed for a good two minutes. So I’m sure joey heard all of that. I wonder what he was thinking when he saw me ?! Hopefully good thoughts I stayed home two days ago and I was looking at the L.A.M.B. clothing line by Gwen Stefani and I really want a pair of her sneakers. they are sooo cute. I have to pairs that I want, I’ll put up pictures later, when I’m at home. I might stay after today for my Beltran detention ?? If someone awesome goes, that is. Taylor and Maddie just were in the library. I love Tay. Anyways, all I can freakin’ think about is tomorrow night ! tj said joey got some new movies so we might watch them. however, it’s his dad’s weekend so he better be able to come ! me and shelby decided that if joey doesnt come tomorrow, we’ll hang out with tj for 30-60 minutes then be like, “oh, sorry, i gg.” haha, then we’d go to starbucks or something awesome like that. I wish my hair was darker. There’s a girl sitting a row away from me and I really like her hair ans her sweater. I don;t know why but I’m in a really good mood right now. 15 minutes left ! yayyy. i’m really excited for this weekend. I am not going to waste my life away hanging around waiting for people. I do make the best of every situation I put myself in though. Like just last week, me and shelby had big plans and justine ruined them, so we decided not to mope around. we went to the old middle school and it was awesome because it literally smelled the same. it had that musty old school smell. I dont like the smell of the highschool, it’s just plain. Even though i have a lot more freedom in mhs, it’s not the same. I miss the teachers too. Haha, and then after like 45 minutes walking around inside, shelby was like “lets go to the track.” so we went outside and we sat on a picnic table, and shelby was like, “hey there’s my name !” and we got really excited/happy/in good modds because the last time we were there it was summer and we were with Geneva, and Tiff Heffron, and we all carved our names into the table. And they were still there. So it was pretty cool. Tomorrow maybe we’ll do the same thing. It’d be really fun. Iwthout tj of course. I think he means well and everything, but he is really annoying. so is mike marinucci. but whatever, I really can’t control that. Tonight bridget and I are setting our alarm clocks to 3:00 am. and im gonna call her cell and we’re going to talk on the phone for like 3 hours and be mad cool. I’m exciiited ! We were supposed to do that another time, but my alarm rang and I was like “Ah, hell nooo.” and then I went back to sleep. I really hope this whole page posts. Sometimes it doesn’t and that if it doesnt this time that will have meant that I spent a whole 45 minutes writing this for nothing. I hope that does not happen. Well, the bell’s gonna ring soon. Wish me luck with hanging out with Joey if you are reading this ! If I do, I will be so excited and happy x10 !!

heeeey

today is tuesday, january 16th, 2007. and im staying home from school today. we just had a long weekend. we had a half day on friday. I WAS SUPPOSED TO HANG OUT WITH JOEY

yayayayya

i’m hanging out with joey this weekend ! i’ll write more about it later

Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the
fear is just of making a decision, because what
if you’re wrong? What if you’re making a mistake
you can’t undo? The early bird catches the worm.
A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is
lost. We can’t pretend we hadn’t been told. We’ve
all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers,
heard our grandparents warning us about
wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to
seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for
ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes.
We have to learn our own lessons. We have to
sweep today’s possibility under tomorrow’s rug
until we can’t anymore. That knowing is better than
wondering, that waking is better than sleeping
and even the biggest failure, even the worst,
beat the hell out of never trying.
-Greys.

i love this qoute.

Crash Into Me ♥

You’ve got your ball
You’ve got your chain
tied to me tight tie me up again
who’s got their claws
in you my friend
Into your heart I’ll beat again
Sweet like candy to my soul
Sweet you rock
and sweet you roll
Lost for you I’m so lost for you

You come crash into me
And I come into you
I come into you
In a boys dream
In a boys dream

Touch your lips just so I know
In your eyes, love, it glows so
I’m bare boned and crazy for you
When you come crash
into me, baby
And I come into you
In a boys dream
In a boys dream

If I’ve gone overboard
Then I’m begging you
to forgive me
in my haste
When I’m holding you so girl
close to me

Oh and you come crash
into me, baby
And I come into you
Hike up your skirt a little more
and show the world to me
Hike up your skirt a little more
and show your world to me
In a boys dream.. In a boys dream

Oh I watch you there
through the window
And I stare at you
You wear nothing but you
wear it so well
tied up and twisted
the way I’d like to be
For you, for me, come crash
into me

:}

:}

this week’s been really good on friday, january 5th was really good !! haha, i was in beltan’s spanish class with joey and we were talking about we got really close. like literally we were 1 inch away from eachother’s face. haha, and beltran walked over and was like “you guys are to close. you can be as close as you want in ze hallways of outside of school, but not in my room.” hahah, and then she was like “joey turn around” and he was like “fine, i’ll turn around and talk to jenn” and he turned around and did the one second motion. eeeh ! he’s so cute and i like him so much. i just hate weekends cause i never see him i wonder if he misses me too. that’d be really cute and awesome and my heart always beats really fast when i think about him. im gonna gooo. i’ll write later on !

:[

:[

i hung out with joey on tuesday, the 26th and it was amazing, and i havent seen him since
it makes me really sad. i dont think he likes me anymore. im realllly trying to not be annoying. and im going to starbucks with justine and mike marinucci wanted to come and we told him he could and he called joey and tj to see if they wanted to join and they dont feel like it. ( i get to see joey tomorrow but it’s probably going to be reallly awkward. pleaseee lord have him still like me as a crush. i like him so much. i think i even like him more than i liked dave. and that is a lotttt. ugh. bring me some good luck ?!

i love joey joey joey

ayyy pal.
im so fucking bored. and i havent seen joey since friday. so that’s like 4 days ! ah. im going to cry if i dont hang out with him tomorrow. but if i do, i’, going to be really excited and happy x10 !!

hey cutieee ;)

this week has been pretty good !
tomorrow im going to the mall with joey, shelby, greg, diana(she’s gheyy.) and t.j.
sounds funnn ! i want joey to ask me out !!! I like him so much !

re-fucking-diculous.

this weekend has to be one of the worst i’ve had in a while. im having a ‘blue christmas’ i guess. i’ve been drawing a lot lately, to keep my mind off things i really don’t wanna think about. things like having no food in my house, my father’s drug addiction, and how this christmas is going to suck since we’ll have almost nothing under the christmas tree. i’ve also been listening to a lot of eminem lately. i drew a picture of him last night. it came out pretty good, i think. and then i did another one, and it came out looking like it was a covergirl advertisment. and then, i did another one and it looks really good. it’s my favorite. im not really sure what to call it though. im reallt gonna try to work on drawing as a new hobby. because what am i supposed to do when im grounded ? last night i went out with shelby, and we met up with greg, mike quinn, jimmy, devin, and jon !!! i miss jon so much, ever since he dropped out i haven’t seen him. i hope i get to hang out with him more. we walked around and ding dong ditched because that’s obviously what the cool kids do. joey, my lover, has been acting really weird lately, and he hasn’t talked to me much in the past few days. So that’s really been bummin’ me out. We walked by his house last night when we were ding dong ditching, and he came outside but he didn’t come with us. So that kinda sucked and I was disappointed. And tonight I was supposed to be going out with Shelby again, and we were gonna walk around and have a really good time, but Jeff and my mom came home, and Jeff started bitching at me so I was like, “You’re gay.” and he was like, “Mom ! Jenn just told me to shut the fuck up.” So my mom screamed at me and I’m not allowed to go out tonight. And, she was like “I can’t wait to pick up your progress report tomorrow ! Your grades will decide whether you get to leave the house during Christmas vacation or not ” UGH. She’s such a fucking bitch. Can’t stand her. Alright well I’m gonna go. Love you guys.

Eminem.

These ideas are nightmares to white parents
Whose worst fear is a child with dyed hair and who likes earrings
Like whatever they say has no bearing, it’s so scary in a house that allows
no swearing
To see him walking around with his headphones blaring
Alone in his own zone, cold and he don’t care
He’s a problem child
And what bothers him all comes out, when he talks about
His fuckin’ dad walkin’ out
Cause he just hates him so bad that he blocks him out
If he ever saw him again he’d probably knock him out
His thoughts are whacked, he’s mad so he’s talkin’ back
Talkin’ black, brainwashed from rock and rap
He sags his pants, do-rags and a stocking cap
His step-father hit him, so he socked him back, and broke his nose
His house is a broken home, there’s no control, he just let’s his emotions
go…

[Chorus]
{C’mon}, sing with me, {sing}, sing for the years
{Sing it}, sing for the laughter, sing for the tears, {c’mon)
Sing it with me, just for today, maybe tomorrow the good Lord will take you
away…

[Verse 2]
Entertainment is changin’, intertwinin’ with gangsta’s
In the land of the killers, a sinner’s mind is a sanctum
Holy or unholy, only have one homie
Only this gun, lonely cause don’t anyone know me
Yet everybody just feels like they can relate, I guess words are a
mothafucka they can be great
Or they can degrade, or even worse they can teach hate
It’s like these kids hang on every single statement we make
Like they worship us, plus all the stores ship us platinum
Now how the fuck did this metamorphosis happen
From standin’ on corners and porches just rappin’
To havin’ a fortune, no more kissin’ ass
But then these critics crucify you, journalists try to burn you
Fans turn on you, attorneys all want a turn at you
To get they hands on every dime you have, they want you to lose your mind
every time you mad
So they can try to make you out to look like a loose cannon
Any dispute won’t hesitate to produce handguns
That’s why these prosecutors wanna convict me, strictly just to get me off
of these streets quickly
But all they kids be listenin’ to me religiously, so i’m signin’ cd’s while
police fingerprint me
They’re for the judge’s daughter but his grudge is against me
If i’m such a fuckin’ menace, this shit doesn’t make sense Pete
It’s all political, if my music is literal, and i’m a criminal how the fuck
can I raise a little girl
I couldn’t, I wouldn’t be fit to, you’re full of shit too, Guerrera, that
was a fist that hit you…

[CHORUS]

[Verse 3]
They say music can alter moods and talk to you
Well can it load a gun up for you , and cock it too?
Well if it can, then the next time you assault a dude
Just tell the judge it was my fault and i’ll get sued
See what these kids do is hear about us totin’ pistols
And they want to get one cause they think the shit’s cool
Not knowin’ we really just protectin’ ourselves, we entertainers
Of course the shit’s affectin’ our sales, you ignoramus
But music is reflection of self, we just explain it, and then we get our
checks in the mail
It’s fucked up ain’t it
How we can come from practically nothing to being able to have any fuckin’
thing that we wanted
That’s why we sing for these kids, who don’t have a thing
Except for a dream, and a fuckin’ rap magazine
Who post pin-up pictures on their walls all day long
Idolize they favorite rappers and know all they songs
Or for anyone who’s ever been through shit in their lives
Till they sit and they cry at night wishin’ they’d die
Till they throw on a rap record and they sit, and they vibe
We’re nothin’ to you but we’re the fuckin’ shit in they eyes
That’s why we seize the moment try to freeze it and own it, squeeze it and
hold it
Cause we consider these minutes golden
And maybe they’ll admit it when we’re gone
Just let our spirits live on, through our lyrics that you hear in our
songs and we can…